all by myself (in a good way!)

going on a solo adventure!

in this week’s newsletter: recapping my bravest adventure ever, sharing the ups and downs of solo traveling, and reflecting on what it means to ‘go your own pace’

dear penpals -

ever since i’ve known him, a good friend of mine has done personal ‘birthday challenges’ each year where he picks a challenge or goal to try and/or complete it. so when i turned 28, i was inspired by him to try and push myself to do my own personal ‘birthday challenge’.

the thing is, these ‘birthday challenges’ are not always supposed to be fun or easy. instead, as stated in its definition, it can be difficult, uncomfortable, and it will push you into unfamiliar territory to build strength, courage, and maybe even give you a new perspective. so when i thought about what would be my ‘birthday challenge’ i immediately knew (but was terrified of admitting it, because it meant i would have to actually do it) it would be to go on my first solo trip.

for those of you who have been following this little journey of mine, you would know that i took my first trip (without family) only 3 months ago (old newsletter here!). i barely made it out of that trip in one piece (only slightly kidding), and yet here i was, considering the possibility of going on my first ever solo trip now?!

it wouldn’t be pretty, it wouldn’t be perfect, and i probably would have a breakdown at some point during the trip. but as terrifying as the thought of solo traveling was, i knew that there was a part of me that had to try. i owed it to myself to try.

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i knew my limits and wasn’t ready to go internationally, so i chose places within japan i wanted to either return to or visit for the first time. which is how i landed on visiting two prefectures - hiroshima and okayama - over a 4 day trip.

i had spreadsheets within spreadsheets, colour coded everything, researched hard, read every website / blog, clicked on every review, and watched as many vlogs as i could leading up to my trip. but no matter how much i prepared, i knew there will never be a moment when i was ready for this trip.

planning could only get me 99% there. i needed to learn to trust myself for the final 1% - and i’m so glad i did.

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click on the image or the link to the video here!

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before, i was quite ashamed of telling people that i’ve never traveled solo before. something about being old(er) and never experiencing something that so many young(er) people have already accomplished made me feel quite small. but i’m learning how important was for me (as is for you) to be patient and listen to the tiny voices that tell you when you’re ready to get up and try.

we often encourage people to “going your own pace” but never really provide them with the space to actually do it. we are part of a system that judges someone who needs more time to accomplish something, we critique someone who is ‘less traveled’ for not seeing or knowing more about the world, and we label someone as too scared, too boring, too old when they don’t fit into our ideal of way of living… and sometimes the person who does this the harshest is ourselves.

i wish i could tell you that coming home from this solo trip awakened this deep desire within me to travel the rest of the world, but it didn’t. i’m still very happy within the comforts of this little village and exploring parts of the world at my own pace. i’m still nervous of solo traveling, i didn’t like being alone 24/7, and missed being with my favourite humans.

and i had a feeling that would be the case when i left my house. but the difference? the little (yet loud) voice inside my head that told me that i wasn’t ready, i wasn’t good enough, i was too old, too scared, too much, is now much quieter than before i left.

it’s still there, and will always be there, but now there’s another voice that’s taking over telling me that i am ready even when it feels like i’m not. i am good enough. i will never be too old, too scared, too much of anything as long as i’m willing to try, and try again.

so whatever ‘birthday challenge’ you might find yourself embarking on this year, i hope that you listen to the right voice inside your head reminding you that it will always be worth it to trust in yourself every time.

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if you ever find yourself traveling to either hiroshima or okayama in the near future and want a list of the hotels, sightseeing spots, restaurants, or stationery stores in the area - i created a google map of all the stops i visited throughout my trip (both shown in the vlog and not) for anyone who is interested!

in preparation for this solo trip, i definitely went hard on the researching and map pinning phase, and felt like it would be a waste to not share the parts of what made this trip so wonderful with you!

click on the image or link to the google map here!

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